It’s not a secret that people with chronic and invisible illnesses get really tired of hearing they look good. You might think this irritation is irrational and that’s okay, because six years ago I probably would have felt the same way. I mean really, who doesn’t like to get a compliment?

But do you know what we do when people tell us that we look good? Most of the time we probably force a smile, say thank you, and then go have a conversation with a fellow spoonie about how annoyed we actually were.

You look good…you don’t look sick…and various other forms of that sentiment are on every “things not to say to someone with a chronic illness” list. So it’s not a secret that we don’t like to hear it. The secret is why.

The simple answer is that just because we look good doesn’t mean we feel…